This week I was given the gift* of watching my close friend and roomie take her last breathes (you can see her below - Julie Ridder). I’ve never been that intimate with death before. Journeying with Julie over these last three years as she has battled cancer has been life changing, and now amidst the absence of her not being with us in her physical body I know that the memories she has left me with will continue to be a changing presence in my life.

Here are a few of the things I’ve noted along the way (there will be some repetition!).

death is not it - neither is this life here on earth it. face your fear - avoiding it makes it worse. loving others and God is really all that life is about - and yea it will suck sometimes but its worth it in the end. people are more important than stuff. live present. savor the moment. keep asking, but remember you can’t control God. don’t give up. slow down. simple living. trust. suffering with others. sitting with others suffering. physical touch can be life giving when your in pain. God can not be put in a box. be honest. sometimes God heals, sometimes he doesn’t - its okay that I don’t know why. live with the mystery. i won’t know everything. hope.

“the only thing cancer got was Julie’s body”

We said goodbye to each other for a season this week.

* Why a gift you may wonder? She gave me the gift of facing something I feared - the taboo subject we don’t talk about that much and try to medicate away - the reality of death. Sharing those final moments with her and being able to come out of the other side without as great a fear, is a gift in my head. Thank you friend x

This entry was posted on Sunday, January 31st, 2010 at 4:20 am and is filed under life, thoughts. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.